The Cooper Street Relic

Just another blog from The Republic Of Hespeler

It’s almost over,the end is near, the last Hurrahs(have I used enough adjectives?), We are in to the last week of the 2010 Election campaign and I think everyone is going to be happy to see it done with. The last two weeks have been very busy for the Mayoral Candidates and i was able to send out my Intrepid undercover reporter, Dixon Hand, out to keep an eye on the 3 Candidates for the top job in the city. He has reported that all 3 candidates have spent the last week going over their notes and recharging their battery’s in anticipation of the last full week of Campaigning.  Here is his report.
Doug Craig spent the last week walking along the Speed River looking for the spirit of Jacob Hespeler among the trees that inhabit the Trails. He seemed at peace with himself, and he hoped that the Great Spirit will lead him to the ever enchanted Speed River Carp which can produce political victory, and unfortunately he spent Saturday along the Speed and that caused him to miss the rally at City hall, and was last seen splashing in the river looking like a Hungry Bear holding up different fish and yelling at the trees.
Linda Whetham had other things on her mind last week as she continued to campaign feverishly while at the same time trying to keep the Engineering  Department away from her Kitchen. It seems that someone tipped off the Department that she had a leaky faucet in her Kitchen sink and they have been trying to shut down her kitchen until after the election, but her Husband Glen has been holding down the fort and has been able to keep them distracted, He was able to divert their attention to the rec room fridge and as they went through and checked the expiry dates on the General Tsao Chicken and the condition of the pizza that was in it, he was able to fix the tap thereby thwarting some-body’s evil plan.

In Andrew Johnson’s case, he has had a totally bad week. It seems that Columbia House Record Club was finally able to track him down and attempt to get him to pay for a purchase that he made in 1994 of a Barry Manilow greatest Hits collection that he had forgot to pay for.  But it got worse when his wife discovered that he had over spent at the local Wal-Mart and was very upset with him. He had purchased the more expensive 3 ply toilet paper when they had a good special on 2 ply and she was not happy. She was heard saying” You keep making bad purchases like that as Mayor you are going to have to get a part time job!”
The life of a Politician!! enjoy your last week of the campaign everyone!  And Dixon, your check is in the Mail, now get out of my back yard!

2 thoughts on “Almost Done!

  1. Rick Cowsill says:

    Jimm, you are the best!… Love your point of view of the silly world around us…

    Keep safe.


  2. Hespeler Herald says:

    Thank You Sir. Good Luck on Monday!

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