The Cooper Street Relic

Just another blog from The Republic Of Hespeler

A little while ago I wrote a story on how I had a bad day and I blamed it all on the Mayor and his Flying monkeys, well yesterday I had another one of those days and again I will blame it on The Mayor and of course his Flying monkeys.

It all started as I rolled out of bed and found my way to the bathroom, I turned on the light and low and behold the lights blew out in the room, after apologising a few times to my Wife for the wet toilet seat I proceeded to fix the lights all the time thinking” Curse you, Mayor Craig’s Flying Monkees”.

I then went to make a pot of coffee and wouldn’t you know it, the Flying monkeys had beaten me to it and broke my Coffee Maker, I settled for an Instant Coffee and cursed the Mayor under my breath. After a bit I settled down and drove my wife to work, but upon returning to my home I hit a patch of Ice in my driveway and since it sits lower than my yard I have a wooden brace all around it and of course i wound up going over the brace and upon backing up I pulled of my front bumper and somehow popped a tire. Standing there looking at the wonton destruction I again looked to the sky’s and cursed the Mayor and his monkeys thinking, If he cancelled the Drayton Project the city would have enough money to keep my driveway salted and this carnage could have been prevented, but alas culture comes before salting my driveway(the bastards). But wait, The monkeys had something else in store for me.

As I entered the house to phone a Tow truck I felt a chill in the air and wouldn’t you know it, while i was out the Mayor sent his monkeys to break my Furnace, that is when I lost it, a cowlick suddenly appeared on the back of my head and to make things even worse I reached for a beer in the fridge and there were none, the Monkees drank all my beer while causing mayhem.

So I plead to you Mayor Craig, take your Flying Monkeys and your Magic 8 ball that council uses and leave me alone.

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